No end to trigeminal neuralgia
"While I’m sitting here, typing fine long sentences, I'm almost giddy of pain, and the left side of my face feels like it’s being pulled way west in the direction of the Atlantic Ocean. My left eye feel like closing up shop for a week or two, and my brain is slowly being stir-fried. Yes, that is what trigeminal neuralgia feels like."
Not my face!
In a world of selfies and size zero clothing, a negative body image can weigh heavily on healthy people, never mind disabled people. Being ill in itself often makes you feel less desirable. In the world of MS, where wheelchairs spread doom and gloom to those that get hit with that tag, body-image requires a whole new level of acceptance. I firmly believe beauty is limited to time and space. In addition, it only runs skin deep and definitely doesn’t reveal true worth.
Defined by myself
"As you can tell, I have lots that strengthens me and drives me forward. I also have (dis)abilities: severe bouts of pain and fatigue, which I bent into a positive writing tool for others to lean on. My limitations serve as other people’s motivation. Their motivation became my inspiration."
Fierce Friday
Ah yes, sometimes my nerves – not nervous system – sometimes my nerves get on my nerves as it were. I happen to coexist with a messed up central nervous system, overly active heartbeat, breathing problems and every now and then I find myself covered with a nice infection or two. If that wasn’t enough, I have a few pet peeves, which on occasion drive me crazy. Ψ Screeching kids in shopping centers. On buses, in cinemas, in my ear. Ψ Said kids kicking my seat in the cinema. How to solve this? ♫♫ Sitting in the back row of the movies ♫♫
It’s OK not to be OK
Chronic pain. Those who have it, can’t wait to get rid of it. Those who don’t, often do not understand what is going on in people’s bodies filled with chronic pain 24/7. Not to reminiscence too much about the good old days – those where the pain was not a constant, unwanted house guest – but I cannot remember what living without pain was like. Waking up feeling jolly, not a single bout of pain stabbing my face, being able to keep my balance on my way to my bathroom, high energy levels… All this was abandoned long ago, and even after 8 hours of sleep, I just can’t remember what life felt like. Healthy people often take their fitness for granted; they don’t question their bodies underperforming for a…
The road to diagnosis
It was a cold, dark February morning and once again, my eye and facial pain were back. The antibiotics my GP gave me the week before did not work at all, and he seemed clueless about what could be wrong with me. I had been on several rounds of antibiotics, I had seen a dentist, went to the Eye & Ear Clinic and I had seen a homoeopath, yet nobody was able to give me a clear answer. The only person somewhat clear on what was wrong with me said that I needed to have my immune and central nervous system checked out. Fast. She was an intuitive healer and turned out to be 100% correct. Go figure. On my way to work that morning, sitting next to a cold…
Captain Jack is back!
Oh yes he is… or rather: she is! Or I am… With quite a captain-look. Black eye patch hiding an eye so desperate to jump out of its socket and an eye that is telling me to stay away from reading, writing and watching television. Hhmm… somehow that is quite hard to do in this day and age of audiovisual technologies, and well… my daily life. But not to worry, I’m sure Captain Jack – or moi… – can find some remedy that doesn’t involve over-medicating on painkillers, boxing gloves to punch my hurting eye out, coffee cans of the hottest black stuff or a brain and eye transplant. Right, so what can be done? Double hhmm… Sleep. Dog. Coffee. Ice cream. Although maybe the latter is telling my stomach…