Friendship
To the many friends that were in my life because of work, in Ireland and elsewhere, and to those who were in my life before MS crashed into my environment… thank you for the fun times, the many discussions we learned from, the trips we went on and the sorrow-free late evening chats… To those that were in my life around the time of my diagnosis… thank you for being there when I didn’t understand what was happening, the silences we shared taking it all in and for visiting me in hospital and at home when I was unable to be there for you…
A tribute to wolves
My first thought when waking up this morning, October 1st, was “Oh no, today is the start of the needless killing of wolves in Wyoming, yet another state set to kill wolves in an inhumane way.” However, Yellowstone National Park is located in Wyoming, and while thousands of tourists flock to the park to see its wolves and other wildlife, wolves outside of the park and in the rest of Wyoming, are doomed. Nature belongs to us all, even if we don’t live in a particular country that abuses it’s natural heritage, and even when we live thousands of miles away. A toxic string of words has therefore been brewing in my head for the last few weeks regarding wolf preservation, if not months, or years. Ever since I was…
Summer, not to me
It’s back! It’s here again and boy I love it! “It” is autumn, and those of you in my physical surroundings know that I live for autumn. And winter. And hey, maybe spring too if it’s not too warm outside! “It” means fresh and clean air entering my lungs and a bit more energy in my old’ bones. “It” also means I feel alive, oh yes I do!
Reality check!
I just saw this picture on a dedicated MS Facebook page. It says “YOU WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT PAIN IS UNLESS YOU HAVE MS!!” Well excusez–moi, please, but that is just OTT. Life is NOT A CONTEST of who has more pain than the other, it’s not a game of showing people how sick we can be. So forgive me for sticking up for others who are otherwise seriously ill, because statements like this only give people the wrong idea of what having MS is really like.
Letting go
Life seems like a joke, out to get you when you least expect it. People disappear from your life, but it’s not until after they’re gone that you realise how much you liked being around them. Or, you understand what being truly happy means because you’ve known absolute sadness. Or you start appreciating silence because you know how loud, annoying and horrible noise can be. Life seems like a joke so; it makes you learn lessons by applying the opposite of what you want. Life is a joke in an ironic way. Murphy’s Law had it in for me years ago. Anything that could go wrong went totally wrong. In the space of 3.5 years I lost part of myself (thank you MS!), and my only sibling, stepdad and four other…
My tired is tired
Yep… right now I am one hell of a great example of how MS can just snap you right back to when you were first diagnosed, hence the large picture stating that very fact. Remember the days where you were just bed-ridden with lots of symptoms not making sense, and pain that kept you up day and night, no matter how tired you were? How so? Well, last week my body was half-fried under the sun in temperatures of 35°C. Microwave temperatures sizzling my body from the outside in, although it felt like I was roasted from the inside out. I still feel like a walking advert for Kentucky Fried Chicken… minus the Kentucky mind you. And the chicken.
Mortality
The superbug that had been staring into my eyes for months seemed long gone. In its wake, it left me wondering. I went through an abyss, one that could resemble Dante's nine circles of hell. That bottom of that abyss had been the morning before the rush into surgery.
