My tired is tired

Yep… right now I am one hell of a great example of how MS can just snap you right back to when you were first diagnosed, hence the large picture stating that very fact. Remember the days where you were just bed-ridden with lots of symptoms not making sense, and pain that kept you up day and night, no matter how tired you were?

How so? Well, last week my body was half-fried under the sun in temperatures of 35°C. Microwave temperatures sizzling my body from the outside in, although it felt like I was roasted from the inside out.  I still feel like a walking advert for Kentucky Fried Chicken… minus the Kentucky mind you. And the chicken.

So how do you deal with this kind of fried-iness state of being? Move into a large freezer? Relocate to the Arctic? Eat tons of Ben & Jerrys ice cream? None of the above I’m afraid. I simply sat in front of my fan every five seconds (no, not my hordes of followers on my blog but my ventilator!). Cooling down is still ongoing, ice cold water ending up all over me in the shower and trying to sleep also.

Sleep? Is that that funny business where you lay down at night, close your eyes and try to get 8h straight in? How do you achieve that?! Tell me, tell me, tell me (jumping up and down of excitement right now, or rather, crawling over the floor and only lifting one toe out of pure exhaustion)! I just have to know because the more tired I become (if that were even remotely possible), the more ways my body keeps finding to keep me entertained at 2am instead of providing me with the necessary ZZZs.

So what exactly is keeping me up I hear you think? Right, here’s a breakdown of my bodily functions (get it? “breakdown”?) We’ll start at the top of my head of what wakes me up of pain because I might just skip or forget one of the things that is actually still working, if working negatively, in my sack of bones:

• my head, and what looks like my brain… about half a square inch at the back of my head, usually left hand side, but when severely fatigued like right now it can also be in the back of the right hand side of my brain
• pain in my eyes, left or right depending on severity of fatigue
• nerve pain my face, same as above
• nerve pain in left arm, left depending on severity of fatigue
• nerve pain in left leg/foot
• and if it’s not nerve pain of some sort. It’s this month’s prize winner of my still-infected Achilles tendon in my left foot! Dr. General Practitioner, I am on my way for your help! And that of the orthopedic team in hospital! They’ll shoot me when they hear how long I’ve been hopping around on that bad foot. I’d shoot myself in the foot if I didn’t need it badly to keep my MS balance from tipping over!

But hey, with all that pain, I just had a thought flashing through my half-active grey cells: thank god I had all my wisdom teeth removed, because they hurt back in the days when I was still young, good-looking and awake… good grief they would hurt! I would howl like a wolf of pain!

Besides the not being able to sleep of pure exhaustion and pain, I also tend to get giddy of fatigue, so please forgive my ramblings of tonight. I promise to be more coherent next time you find yourself reading new posts. Right now I am too tired to strink thaight if you know what I mean.

So right… since my sheep are too fat to jump the fence these days, I’m going to count my blessings instead. Night night!

© Willeke Van Eeckhoutte and Ireland, Multiple Sclerosis & Me, 2011-2013. Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Willeke Van Eeckhoutte and Ireland, Multiple Sclerosis & Me with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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