Your lockdown is over; ours has only just begun

You are your own worst enemy.

A contradiction.

A cognitive dissonance.

You know you can pick up a needle lying on the table, yet your fingers refuse.

You know your eyesight serves you well with the use of contact lenses and glasses, yet it doesn’t capture light and shapes as well as it should.

You know you can wiggle around the house in high heels without doing a Miss Congeniality dive, yet your balance goes from hero to zero when a neurologist asks you to walk heel to toe.

You know you can talk about anything with anyone, yet your usual quick-witted mindset stops being a waterfall of possible strategies on how to live life to the fullest, yet it is only 10 AM and you already need a nap.

Despite your inner strengths, your body has, without your approval, adapted to a slower way of life.

Yes, you are a problem.

A liability.

To yourself.

To your family.

To friends.

And, in this day and age of unruly bats, Chinese wet markets and pandemics, you have become a liability to the world around you.

You have MS, a chronic, unpredictable, immune-mediated, neurodegenerative illness that is still without a cure.

Just let that sink in for a moment, please.

Keep the words ‘without a cure’ as well as ‘neurodegeneration’ at the forefront of your inner dialogue, please.

You can store ‘unpredictable’ in the top drawer of your inner dialogue.

Today is May 22nd. I began writing this article a few weeks ago. Because of a multiple sclerosis relapse, I am only averaging a paragraph a day. Being too much of a perfectionist, only two sentences remain after each edit.

In between takes, another good eye gleams at the Washington Post, the New York Times, Politico, and a few other quality news outlets to get my daily feed of coronavirus updates because Europe isn’t as fast as detailing the details. I hang onto world-renowned immunologist Anthony Fauci’s every word, for he seems the oracle the world’s most impacted countries should revere. Without Fauci, if I allow myself to dig deeper into a story, I dig myself deeper into despair.

By now, the 7.8 billion global community has met a similar match in a coronavirus that, like MS, is equally without a cure. It equally attacks people without warning, and without logic. Doesn’t care where or how you live. It is there. Just there.

In MS – remember chronic, unpredictable, neurodegenerative, without a cure – there is now a plethora of medicines that try to slow down the disease’s progress. It comes with a warning though. If you do not stick to your disease-modifying treatment (DMT) and changed lifestyle schedule, you will give degeneration an entry to attack your immune system by stupid behaviours, or make what was already unpredictable, a hell of a future spent cursing yourself.

I’ve been there, done that, and still regret thinking I knew better than my neurologist.

Yet, even without any stupidity of your good self, MS’s course can be faster and more severe than that of others; unpredictable doesn’t even begin to describe it. And unless you have brilliant scientific minds like Anthony Fauci, a cure will not quite happen during your lifetime. After all, multiple sclerosis is a Cadillac, the Bentley of neurological illnesses that will stay with you until your last day on the hallowed peanut we all trod on, and a peanut that now seems too toxic an environment even for the best, healthiest and toughest among us.

Just let that sink in as well.

Little did I know that life with MS could get even worse. It can take you down a rabbit hole without an emergency exit. If you do happen to find one, you might find that dragging yourself 25 steps upwards with legs that don’t really work because your elegant stride is too wide and not fit for purpose.

Of all the illnesses that crossed my life the past few decades, only multiple sclerosis continues to add so much irony, sarcasm, and idiocy to my daily life, it almost becomes laughable.

It is, until it isn’t.

I can give you a list.

You are under the supervision of specialists and professors across different medical branches like neurology, ophthalmology, physiotherapy and speech therapy to name just a few, yet the symptoms they treat are quite often keeping you from physically attending your appointments with them.

This reminds me of the fact that two years ago, one of my articles was shortlisted for the Blog Post of the Year in the Ireland Blog Awards competition. After initially agreeing to attend the award ceremony, I had to pull out despite being asked by its organizers to please be present.

The reason for cancelling?

The very illness that made me win the Blog Post of the Year Award.

Oh, the irony in that!

Other issues as eventful.

A hospital-acquired superbug, half dead in hospital, 10 days in an isolation room, no visitors allowed. ‘Avoiding bacterial infections is not just a must, but a need,’ I was told. In the meantime, keep taking thirty(ish) tablets, a daily injection, vitamins, physio, light exercise, and rest, most of all, REST!

And, oh, the sarcasm of the coronavirus outbreak.

‘Don’t forget, you need to be very wary of viral infections also.’

No shit.

More Dettol and Lysol here.

Dettol or Lysol there.

Dettol and Lysol everywhere.

I have more cleaning products than some have pairs of socks, underwear, and house-hoodies combined.

Let’s just say that I have this COVID-19 thing down to a tee.

Twelve years’ experience in trying not to catch any bacterial or viral infections. I so, so, so have this corona-thing down to a tee. Remember: MS is unpredictable, immune-mediated, and without a cure. I wouldn’t be one bit surprised, so should I be diagnosed with COVID-19.

So, here’s why I am annoyed with the world today.

While restrictions in Europe, the USA and the far east are being relaxed, I have this to say.

Governments, do you really, honestly believe that because everyone behaved well during lockdown, that they will keep on behaving that way once you loosen restrictions? Did you really, now? If you are that ignorant, wow. Just wow.

Even when you open that door just a few centimetres, people will not just take an arm, but they will rip your whole body to shreds, zombie-style. Many believe they need to let loose of the illness that had dared them into experiencing ‘an unbearable life.’

Some may shout, ‘Good work, guys, we flattened the whatever so we can throw away the facial masks! Yeah baby, we’re talking without a mask again so let’s have a party! We will like it was 1999 and we will forget there was ever such a thing as social distancing!’

What a bunch of malarkey.

Downright insanity and selfishness

People with chronic, neurodegenerative illnesses, or those fighting cancer or other severe diseases in the meantime, will say this, ‘Great. Just great. You just flattened your whatever and go behave like animals as if you had been kept in eternal captivity. Do you realise however that from now on, you will hold the fate of people with immune-deficiencies and incurable illnesses in your hands? You may have come out of lockdown and full of quarantine-fatigue, but ours will remain until we’re physically terminated, expired.’

In short, while you refuse to wear facial masks, observe social distancing, and do as your momma told you how to wash your hands, we – the immune-deficient of this world, and are being used as biological warfare targets.

Indeed, no stringent governmental and medical measures will ever be enough if people do not give a damn about others once they are given an inch on how to break free from what they perceive as ‘police state tactics.’

I am not speaking from a place of hate or ill will, nor am I a drama queen. It is understanding human behaviour both from morality and from an evolutionary psychology standpoint. At its core, is survival selfish? Will it always make us think selfishly first, rather than selflessly in fight or flight events?

A prime example is what is happening all over Europe and the US. Cities relaxed their COVID-19 restrictions, and the first thing they do is run to beaches as if to welcome D-Day soldiers. However, they wore no masks and didn’t apply social distancing.

You can ask yourself how altruistic you are when it comes to it. Did people throw away their masks because they were sick and tired of them? Or do those who still wear them do so from a standpoint of knowing that you are protecting others from yourself, instead of you protecting yourself from them. It is but a tiny line in the sand, but it will have grave consequences, and this has already shown that restrictions being lifted has led to an increase in new coronavirus infections.

As long as there is no vaccine, danger will be everywhere whether it will be in the form of a reinfection or reactivation.

Since March 26th, I’ve left the house just twice -aside from leaving the garbage bin on the pavement on my driveway to be picked up by the recycling company. Remember: chronic, unpredictable, immune-mediated, neurodegenerative, without a cure, do not catch bacterial or viral infections.

That is how much I fear a completely free opening of the world. Evolutionary psychology tells us that no, you will not adhere to outlined, strict warnings and measures; as soon as you see others not giving a hoot anymore, you will all too gladly join the pack. In the meantime, people with serious, life-threatening illnesses will continue to remind you of your inability to grant us a life well-lived as well.

Hell, we have been begging you for months.

Your lockdown was just temporary. Ours has only just begun.

For more info about COVID-19 in Ireland and abroad:

Ireland

Latest updates, Health Department, Government of Ireland

Updates and information from across government, Health Department and Government of Ireland

Public health measures in place right now, Health Department, Government of Ireland

COVID-19 Health Surveillance Monitor (Ireland), Geohive Health Surveillance Monitor (Ireland)

Coronavirus (COVID-19), Health Service Executive, Ireland

Symptoms and causes

Testing

Treatment

Restricted movements and self-isolation

Protect yourself and others

Minding your mental health during COVID-19

COVID-19, Health Protection Surveillance Centre Ireland (HPSC)

Cases in Ireland

Advice for vulnerable groups

Advice and guidance for healthcare workers

Guidance for non-clinical settings

Advice for the general public

Posters

Video resources

Interactive map: COVID-19 National Summary, RTE News, Raidió Teilifís Éireann

Coronavirus updates, RTE News, Raidió Teilifís Éireann

International

World Health Organization (WHO)

European Centre for Disease Prevention and Control (ECDC)

Coronavirus (COVID-19), Center for Disease Control and Prevention

[SPANISH] Coronavirus (COVID-19), Enfermedad del coronavirus 2019 (COVID-19) / Center for Disease Control and Prevention

[SPANISH] Cómo protegerse y proteger a los demás, Enfermedad del coronavirus 2019 (COVID-19) / Center for Disease Control and Prevention

[SPANISH]Qué hacer si está enfermo, Enfermedad del coronavirus 2019 (COVID-19) / Center for Disease Control and Prevention

2018 Winner Best Blog Post with ‘3443 Needles’, Blog Awards Ireland, Ashville Media Group, Dublin, Ireland
◾ Everyday Health: Top 10 MS Blogs to Follow in 2020
◾ MyTherapy: Multiple Sclerosis Blogs: 10 of the Best in 2019
◾ Feedspot: Top 50 MS Blogs to follow in 2020, 2019, 2018, 2017
◾ Everyday Health: Top 10 MS Blog of 2018
◾ MyTherapy: Best MS Blog for Simplicity 2018
◾ Ireland Blog Awards: Finalist 2014, 2015, 2017

© Willeke Van Eeckhoutte and Ireland, Multiple Sclerosis & Me, 2011-2020. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Willeke Van Eeckhoutte and irelandms.com