A future without chronic illness
I could think of many dates, funny ones, productive ones and those that would mean to a lot of friends and family. If I could choose though, I’d want to be there when a cure for MS is found. Two million people worldwide are living with this incurable illness in their brain and spinal cord, leading to disabilities that maim them or make them withdraw from society, even life.
Christmas: The Paradox of Our Time
“The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness. We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We’ve learned how to make…
Dissecting words
“Billie… smile!” “Billie, this is a business company, not the beach!” “Oh Bee, you’re such a bad dancer!” “It must be great being on sick leave so much; it’s like being on a long holiday!” “Look at her, Monday morning and still drunk!” These sentences might just be background noise to some, but to a person with a neurological illness, those words can cut like tiny slithers of glass.
Single life?
"However, I am not MS and MS is not me. It may reside inside my brain but that is where the relationship ends. I accept it is there, but it will not make me long for a relationship just to be in a relationship, or to have someone present to care for me day in, day out. Quite independent, indeed."
Philosophy of Friendship
Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend. Albert Camus An empty white page on my laptop. Too warm to write, too warm to make sense out of nonsense on my own. In fact, even when I’m not on my own, my non(sense) seems to consist of bouts of gibberish fueled by a brain roasted like a Kentucky Fried Chicken. No need to travel to the Mediterranean to have heatwaves; I never said life in Ireland would make sense. In between July 1st and today there’s been the birthday of yours truly. No, I didn’t spend it drinking, smoking and getting high. As you know, said yours truly is of the non-party-animal…
MS: a social disconnect
Therein lies the disconnect: the way others want me to be, and me not being able to keep up. How many of us have pretended to be well enough to walk another 500 meters? How many say they are OK when they feel pain in their limbs, their eyes and in their soul? How many say they will be able to go to work when they were awake half the night because of pain? Unwillingly we are put in a non-self-imposed isolation; we are put there by our illness, and quite often by the outside world. Our mental functioning is now processed differently because of our illness.
2012: not the end of the world
It’s been an eventful year, and even though there are still 3,5 weeks to go before we enter 2013, I can safely say that this year was one of personal growth and finding myself. Personal growth involves letting go of things you don’t want to clutter your mind, and perhaps ups and downs need to be part of that package also. Somehow inner strength – still wondering where it came from – and hope has kept me walking with my head held high. I’ve learned that yes, I am alternative and it’s OK to be so, not in a punk, anarchist kind of way, but I refuse to be put in one type of box because there’s more to myself than blindly following the crowd to be accepted. I’ve never…