MS: a life filled with paradoxes
Despite my urgency to find my footing in a world transformed by MS, I found myself in need of time and space to delve deeply within, to re-establish myself amidst an onslaught of new normals. Adapting to something so wildly unpredictable, the relentless cycle of adaptation was not only disheartening but also deeply confusing.
Life with MS: 17 years of ‘what the hell just happened?!’
Life goes on with all the good it can bring, and with goals I yet want to achieve, so I tolerate MS. There’s no resentment or blame, no more heartache, guilt or doubt.
MS, here today, gone tomorrow?
Degeneration happens, yet it forgets to enlighten you in which physical state you will wake up in the morning, and how you will eventually go to sleep at night. If your persistent MS fatigue is anything like mine, powernaps are overrated, and you go for XXX-large naps.
Happiness and MS
In short, I felt like gutting my immune system from my entrails. My mind from my brain. And my eyes' life experiences dunked in a glass jar filled with ethanol. Life with MS. Nobody said it would be easy. Or, straightforward.
MRI scans, hope or defeat
A war zone. It seemed like a war zone. Sound effects of an AK47 gun amid MRI vibrations and banging noises usually taking place on construction sites. Tinnitus adding an overlay I can miss like never before. Magnetic resonance imaging is a godsend to ill people. In regards to MS, it gives a clear view of what is physically going wrong inside the brain, spinal cord, and optic nerves. Add some contrast fluid, and you light up like a Christmas tree, just like mine did this morning. Or so I was told. Sudden, loud sounds twitch my head involuntarily. The upstairs part of my body locked in a mask, I now realise how Leo DiCaprio felt when he played The Man in the Iron Mask.
